It’s that lovely time of year again, it’s Valentines Day – but do you really give a sh*t?
Follow our 5 easy reasons you’ll be able to say “Be Mine” and almost mean it.

Some Chocolates Are Coming Back To YouImage may be NSFW.
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She won’t finish those chocolates. Who likes coconut cream anyway? What the hell’s an orange butter-cream? What’s left might not be the best in the box, but some of them will end up on your side of the plate. 

That Expensive Food Might Be Worth ItImage may be NSFW.
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Expensive dinners suck, but do you really need an excuse to buy yourself a nice steak?
You might be footing the bill for both meals, but if it’s expensive – it might as well be worth a few bites. Set priced menus might melt your wallet, but if your night ends in “Ribeye” we know you’ll manage to push through, somehow.

Sex. Maybe.Image may be NSFW.
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Take it easy, hot shot. There’s a chance it could happen.
The more you invest in the date, the more likely you don’t end up on the couch.

Gifts Are Cheaper Than Divorce (Or A Break Up)

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Buy the teddy bear, grab some flowers and suck it up. If you don’t, you might be stuck with an even bigger bill – or even bigger hole to dig yourself out of.

It Happens Every Year, Get Used To ItImage may be NSFW.
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We know the St. Valentine rears his ugly, glitter covered head at least once a year by now. Take the fight to Hallmark and other “caring” companies that count on you to forget. Stock up on cards this year and you won’t have to scour the card aisle of your local CVS at 1AM.

Did you choose another way through Valentines Day?